Tuesday, 20 September 2011

How long is withdrawal supposed to last?

It's been over a week since I've stopped drinking.  It's true that I have a lot more energy than before but I'm still not even close to being back to my regular pre-drinking self.  I can't stop sweating, I'm freezing cold, have intense headaches, my hands are still shaking, and I'm having trouble with my memory.  At work today I forgot my own telephone number.  I couldn't even remember the area code. 

It's all worth it though.  I've accomplished more (housework, bills, writing, painting, etc.) in the last four days than I have in the last year alone.  I'm amazed.  I'm starting to get my life back.  There is a light at the end of the tunnel.  God, I hate cliches.  I'm excited to see how much more energy and motivation I'll have once the last of my symptoms have disappeared. 

I still really want to drink.  The urge doesn't happen very often anymore, which is good.  But because I've gotten used to not having the cravings ALL THE FUCKING TIME anymore, the ones that I get seem a lot stronger.  When I get one, it's overwhelming.  I've almost given in a few times. 

I knew this was going to be hard but I had no idea just how hard it really is.  Kudos to every other addict that got and stayed sober. 

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